ways to improve my writing, HAH

WELL I COULD START with my spelling, and not accidentally hitting the caps lock button and then deciding its to late to change it. i could be more professional in my writing rather then being a sarcastic charismatic stallion who uses word he doesn't really understand. i could not get distracted by other meaningless actions while i write. I could not call my self a charismatic stallion, but then id be a liar. I could use more English slang in my writings. I could actually write about something that would be bloody terrific if i didn't think every thing was stonking great already and then get my knickers in a twist later because its not stonking great its bloody apples. I could try and not do so much to make people impressed. I could realize in the end whats this all gonna matter. then i realize i need money, and the best way to get money is to jump through hoops or be lucky, neither of which i excel at. I could become a monk. I think I'm gonna be a monk. I need to stop going in random directions with my writings. id like to think its entertaining to others though. i hope it is i have a pretty dark sense of humor at least a demented one if not one that thrives from cultural references from Harvey birdman and other great shows. HA HA dead baby jokes.

but honestly, I'm not sure how i can improve my writing, by working at it i guess. and if you read everything above ill give you a cookie.